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Friday, December 25, 2009

ALL IZZ WELL

Just like space and time, may be the whole materialistic domain is relativistic or probably, merely an illusion. It’s just that the individual human intelligence or actions are like those random microscopic domains which even out at a broader level without affecting much the time travel projections through the actual frames of cosmic evolution. Probably, there is no absolute truth but mere pursuit of something closer and closer through various iterations as the aspect of being a human itself rules out the perfection. Still it is neither recommended nor desired to quit your duties in sloth under the cover of austerity. Indolence can never be ecstatic. It’s just a pseudo satisfaction enshrouding deep guilt within. But neither is that compulsive need to be on your toes all the time, justified. What’s use of taking life so seriously that one loses the beauty of ingenuousness, craziness, acceptance, fun, smiles and above all life itself..

So on this festive occasion of Christmas... Let’s all ease of our pressure and say-

‘ALL IZZ WELL’

Let the sand lose the clenched fist

Let yourself find craziness for a romantic tryst

Let your watch slip the ticks of time

Let your blaring thoughts switch to silent mime

Let all your tensions melt away

Let new rays of hope arise and light your way

Let your ego go blunter

Let a new spirit of enthu’ turn your life’s punter

Let your innocence give way to smile

Let your dreams and imaginations walk an extra mile

Let emotions rule and bots trail

Let the simplicity, ingenuity and beauty prevail

Let acceptance, forgiveness, happiness ring your bell

Let’s forget everything for a moment and say All Izz Well...

I wish all my blog readers lots of love, peace and happiness... Merry Christmas!


- krazy idiot

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

JAI MANGLU BABA

Digest: This post is a writer's humorous take on one of news headlines in 'Times of India' - /It's official now: Ministers' relatives and companions can avail free air travel/. The post is written in Hinglish with a reference of some hypothetical 'Manglu Baba' to enhance the humor effect. A contemporary hindi television watcher can better enjoy the post.



How is ‘A’ related to ‘D’ type long link relationship questions in the analytical reasoning section of those aptitude tests get on my nerves as like me, English also doesn’t have much respect and sense of human societal relationships. Saala ek ‘aunty’ title ke under all small middle large packs of chachi, taayi, bua , mami, mausi, friend ki mummy, mummy ki friend sb cover ho jata hai..!!

Who says these societal relationships are worth their weight in dust??..Arrey hum se puchho, inki keemat...Thanks to these relations only – ‘aaj langoor ke haath angoor hainJ

The day is still fresh in my mind, jab meine ‘manglu baba’ ke ashram me (kya??? Manglu baba ko nahi jantey?? Go get a fist of water, and choke urself by diving in it...Manglu baba, paraanthey wali gali se jo purani haveli dikhti hai, uske pichhwarey me rehtey hain! DUBARA MAT PUCHHNA) mannat maangi thi ke jis din mujhe plane me udne ka chance milega, usi din nangey paaon unke ashram ke pichhwade jakar , mombatti jalaunga, nariyal forunga aur baba ke charity box me purey 11 rupaye chadaunga!!

Mere barson ki tapasya has shown come to colors.... ‘manglu baba’ ne meri sun li...unke ghar me der hai pr andher nahi... (manglu baba ka Prasad- a times of india link) ... meri mausi ki behan ki saas ke bete ke chachey ke bhatijey ke cousin ki saali ki nanad ke husband ke dost ke father minister hain... and guess what!! ab toh hum b plane waley ho gye hain!! And this time, I am gonna ‘mannat’ for a private chopper...!!

Do u knw, what was the reason for my last break up?? Kya? Mein Brahman ka ladka hu aur wo kayasth ki beti?? Crap! Arrey ni wo khabar pakki nahi hai...asali baat to ye thi ...ki meri girlfriend ke dusre boyfriend ke pass ‘karizma’ thi aur mere pas ‘90’ model bajaj chetak jo petrol se jyada dhakkey se chalta hai...( I always told her how fuel efficient it was...bt usmey itni samajh hoti toh meri sath hi kyn hoti :P).. But now she wd realize her mistake...mere sath hoti toh aj plane me jati..

Paise uske pitaaji ki tax pocket se jaayenge aur yahan mein aur meri girlfriend plane udayengey :))


- krazy idiot

Monday, December 21, 2009

Ctrl + Z

Digest: The writer after messing up a big time desperately wishes for some power to rewind time a few minutes back or to undo the last done activity just the way he uses 'control + Z' function on his laptop.


Is there anyone of u, who has never ever thought of undoing a particular moment of time to change its code and let it evolve into a different present?? Or in other words, have u never wished for a ‘Ctrl + Z’ function in your life???

It occurs to all of us indiscriminately for things ranging from anything in or beyond our control like after accidental formatting of some important files, some road accident, a messed up exam, missed flights/trains, some burnt out dish, some watered important papers, a prank that got serious, addiction, finding ur break up mate with someone else, a night of sudden rush of emotions, some unwilled crime and the list never ends.

Probably it’s not the feeling itself but the after reaction that accounts to distinct human nature and hundreds of psychological terms. Here comes, the locus of control, which may find some ‘externals’ to stick to ‘everything happens for good’ philosophy and overcome or ‘why just everything bad happens to me’ types to shatter; and the ‘internals’ to get totally blown up or the poised beings to hold their composure.

Then comes humanities deepest quests of cosmic evolution; if the things are evolving like systematic unrolling of a tangled thread, a regular evolution or is it like free one as that of a Brazilian butterfly flapping its wings to bring tornadoes in Texas? Well chaos theory seems much plausible.

But can anyone change the initial parameters at present, let’s say with some deep concentrated thought, to lead to a different future? And not just to different but to best future? Lets peek into Eric Bress and J. Mackye Gruber directed ‘The Butterfly Effect’ in which the protagonist Ashton Kutcher with the ability of undoing his past events, even after trying his best to provide best circumstances to his dear ones never leads a perfect situation and rather finds harming them in a way or other even losing his girl ‘Amy Smart’ at the end of movie.

Probably, it’s the Anthropic principle which holds the things at broader level; And for personal level, there is no best situation but just favorable and unfavorable circumstances which can be handled skillfully. For let’s take the case of some addiction be it smoking. Most of cases arise due to peer pressure in hope of looking cool or matured or sometimes the simple argument is to be a man!!! Now that’s something gross, if 17-18 yrs of holding that manly thing under your pants couldn’t tell you who you are; Do you think a cigarette butt would?? Don’t befool yourself..

-krazy idiot

Thursday, December 17, 2009

X PORN

Its quite long that i have updated my blog. Though ideas and thoughts, as usual, kept haunting my mind, it was a bit difficult to take time to process them into full fledged posts. As now, i have concluded my project semester and the like stuff that took me involved, i am putting lots of those into one post. One more thing, the page is redirected and i want my blogger buddies to shift to this and join this.

For the blogger buddies, who have come here with the sole intent of finding some kinky stuff to satiate their deviant tastes, i announce beforehand that the title is a little bit of dupery and the title 'X PORN' stands for '10 Personalities Outspeaking Repulsive Notions'. :)

Although there are lots of such people, lets take some of those of India's concerns.


Barkha Dutt : The tough woman, u might have got a chance to catch sometime through ‘the third eye’ column of ‘The Hindustan Times’ or the NDTV talk show ‘We The People’ or some news bulletin, if nothing else, atleast through her projections in ‘Romilla Dutta’ a war news reporter wearing a cropped haircut played by actress Preity Zinta in bollywood flick ‘Lakshay’. The lady, who has ever shown her enthusiasm at its full swing bringing every tragic event be it Kargil war, Tsunami or the 26/11 mumbai attack right before ur eyes in ur home in as detailed way as possible, abusing every rule of ethical journalism, jeopardizing many a live and helping terrorists in every which way, inviting a great deal of harsh criticism from Indian Navy, government officials on media, information ministry and bloggers community. The worst part was that, instead of accepting her mistake, she was found suing Chaitanya Kunte, a blogger condemning her irresponsible behavior.


Arindam Chaudhary : Recall the full colored page advertisements highlighting ‘ Dare to think beyond IIMs’. Yes m talking of that very daring guy with claims taller than Burj Dubai, a graduate and dean of his family institute IIPM, an institute which is self proposed to be the best B school in India with some facilities which no indian school can ever dream of providing and not to forget free laptops and foreign tours to its students over and above the best placements ever!!??!!??..!! The claims were challenged by many a parties like jammags and other and were falsified in every which way. Leaving it aside, the guy has fully expressed himself and his every new conceived notion of his mind ranging from anything to every thing ( even free counseling and advices for what movies should u watch!!!) through his paid full page advertisements in various national dailies.


Ajmal Amir Kasab : Meet the special guy, the lone surviving 26/11 terrorist, who is living at an expense of Rs. 8.5 laks a day by Maharashtra government accounting to more than 32 crores so far ( a Times of India report). The 2008 mumbai massacre prime accuse is a very hard-to-please guy and demands luxury treatment. Don’t get blown-up by his demands. Demands are very simple n placative like mutton biryani n basmati rice for his food, perfume for fighting his bad body odour, toothpastes for his happydent smile, urdu newspaper (which one?) and stroll outside the cell for fresh air. Don’t u appease him and he gets wild with rage and abuses the jail staff.


Russell Peters : The Anglo-Indian descent, a Canadian stand up comic. Get some of his videos on youtube and u ll come to know how racially charged dumb ass he is!! Man, he has got springs all over his body to make those ridiculous expressions just to utter complete crap about Indians. I would be entertained if he had any healthy comedy stuff be it against Indians, but most of the time its so cheap stuff to get cheap American laughs!! The funny part is yet to come, INDIANS! yes, some of my Indian friends are more than happy to buy his over expensive tickets just to listen to how cheap Indians are!

U call it modesty! I call it stupidity.


Sameer Barua: Prof. Barua, director IIM A announces ‘IIMs have decided to continue with computer-based test for 2009. We also look forward to continue the CAT through computer-based testing in future’. CAT, one of the most coveted exams in India, was marred by technical glitches, mismanagement, unfair advantages, cheating cases, question leakages, server breakdown and bla-bla, this year. CAT was conducted online, first time in its history for 2.41 lakh candidates across the country. IIMs should definitely be praised for this innovative step. Conducting paper- pencil based test for such a large no. of students was getting very tough for the institutes as it leaves professors at IIMs busy for weeks taking care of printed papers for security purposes. And conducting a retest is not at all easy task and could cause a lot of mayhem and changes in academic schedule. But seeing all the disaster, the action taken cant be justified on any basis. As in a country, where IIMs are no less than religious institutes and exams like CAT, JEE are held sacred, determining future of large section of student community, taking such a action that too when the IIMs are internally divided (all iim faculties including directors except directors iim a/b are demanding a retest to maintain integrity of test and restore student faith in the exam. The egoistic Barua, tells director IIM C to conduct his own test if he doesn go his accord!!) is condemned in every which way.


Raj Thakrey: I really don’t find words to say about this superhero. Before my blood blast off my veins, I prefer to keep mum and quit.

Mayawati: A self proclaimed ‘zinda devi’- living goddess. This devi is my favorite. I have already made her references in my earlier posts. The goddess who, sometimes back, was engaged in making the land of UP a heaven by beautiful gardens and all, now wanted its trifurcation for its better development. Need I say more?


Shabana Azmi : A film actress , a social activist, a former MP and a muslim (as she introduces herself), has ever spoken out her mind very frankly and openly. Though she sounds a bit rational sometimes but the lady really loses her way in flow. The lady who suddenly came to realize sometime back what her religion is, finds herself throwing various statements concerning muslims and islam. But the lady had to take the rebuke from her own community in the ‘veil controversy’ and was told to mind her business. Last year it occurred to the same lady to state that ‘Indian democracy is unfair to muslims and despite Indian secularism muslims are discriminated against'. This was something really gross and incomprehensible, that too when the country had seen a muslim president and when the prime minister of the nation- Dr. Manmohan Singh- announces that the minorities especially muslims must have first claim on resources (although a cheap political stunt for vote bank). For her statements of she not getting a flat, she should come to know that its not the fault of Indian democracy but her community, which makes itself less adaptable anywhere due to its preconceived notions.


Bajrang Dal: This goes for all be it Ram sene, shiv sena , bajrang dal, VHP or anyother self proclaimed guardian of our Indian culture. Who gives right to such fools to define and design our culture?? What do they know of our culture?? Do you think India, a land changing its color every 100 km in every respect be it religion, language, style, dress, festival, foods etc sticks to a culture defined by these fundamentalists. I don’t think ancient Indians who had such a high hold on spiritual science would find sex to be something petty and repulsive. This pious activity should be cherished and celebrated. I suppose there have always been enough negative elements in the society to modify our culture to suit their own. And a section of society is always docile enough to take anything from such overcharged fools.


Guess what : Who is last of these X pornstars??? No, not Shah Rukh Khan, Its I, the krazy idiot...after all I too speak a lot of nonsense all the time. Haina??

-krazy idiot